【视频欣赏】
【听力文本】
You may be right, but are you happy? Decide whether winning is more important to you than getting along.
You Will Need
Responsibility
Respect
Kindness
Step 1: Find out what it was(找出问题的根结所在,不要一副大恩人的姿态)
Find out what the offense was before apologizing, or risk making things worse by coming off as patronizing. Be willing to act responsibly and make peace.
找出自己究竟是什么地方冒犯了对方,不要盲目地道歉或者去以恩人的姿态自居。主动负起责任,让气氛缓和下来。
Step 2: Avoid blaming(避免责备对方)
Take responsibility. Avoid qualifying reservations for the apology, which usually begin with “but” and end with a transfer of blame.
负起责任。不要为自己的道歉找借口,避免以道歉的口吻开始,结果还是转移到责备对方。
Step 3: Express regret(表达自己内心的后悔)
Express regret with genuine shame and offer to change. Relationships rely upon honorable behavior, and nonverbal cues that imply it’s the other person’s fault undermine peace.
真诚地表达自己的歉意,并决定要改正。牢固的关系是建立在诚信的基础上的。可以默默地提示对方的失误。
Step 4: Face them(面对面地说清楚,不要通过电话)
Face each other when apologizing instead of doing it over the phone, or in an e-mail or text. Show some class and respect their feelings.
道歉的时候最好面对面,不要通过电话,或者是邮件,信件等。尊重对方的感情。
Any resistance to apologize shouldn’t come from a misguided need to control the partner or to avoid losing ground. Heal the conflict instead of prolonging it.
道歉并不是为了控制对方或者保护自己的领地。你的出发点是结束彼此的冲突,而不是延长。
Step 5: Listen to them(听对方将自己的话说完)
Let the other person speak and hear them out, in case their viewpoint has been completely misunderstood. Assure them that no disagreement can change the security of the relationship.
让对方将话说完,仔细听着,以免误解。让对方明白任何的分歧都不会影响彼此的友谊。
If you can’t bring yourself to admit you’re wrong, try to agree to disagree.
如果你不能承认自己是错的,那么就试着让对方接受你的不同意。
Step 6: Soothe the situation(缓和双方紧张的气氛)
Soothe the situation with an activity to leave the disagreement behind. Buy them flowers or a small trinket as a peace offering, and move on.
将分歧抛在一边,这样可以缓和矛盾。送给对方一个小礼物。
In the 1970 film Love Story, the protagonist concludes with the famous line: “Love means never having to say you’re sorry.”