I remember thinking at the time

我总是一直在想

that so many of the men that I admired most

我所欣赏的大部分人

that their lives were dedicated to something greater than themselves.

他们都为某些事情做出了牺牲

So you got married because men you admired were married?

所以你结婚是因为你欣赏的人都结婚了？

No, no. It's more like I had this-- This idea of my best self, you know?

不，不，是我的主意?

And I wanted to pursue that

我想做个高尚的人

even if it might have been overriding my honest self.

即使不是自己的真实愿望

You know what I'm saying?

你知道我在说什么吗?

In the moment, I remember thinking it didn't much matter, the who of it all.

那一刻，我觉得是谁并不重要

I mean, that nobody is gonna be everything to you

我的意思是说， 没有一个人可以意味着全部

and that it's just the action of committing yourself

只是自己的一种承诺

you know, meeting your responsibilities, that matters.

自己应该负起的责任，这才是重要的

I mean, what is love, right, if it's not respect, trust, admiration?

就是说，爱难道不是尊重、信任、钦仰么?

And l-- I felt all those things.

所有这些我都感觉到了

Cut to the present, and I feel like I'm running a nursery

回到现实， 我感觉自己是和以前的爱人

with somebody I used to date, you know.

在开托儿所

I mean, I'm like a monk, you know.

就是说我感觉自己像修道士

I mean, I've had sex less than 1 0 times in the last four years.

我的意思是说这4年来我只有过不到10次性生活