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2013年高考英语天津卷英语作文点评

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[2013年高考英语天津卷书面表达原题展示]
2013年高考英语天津卷英语作文

[2013年高考英语天津卷书面表达写作指导]

2013年高考英语天津卷书面表达的命题是一篇演讲稿。根据演讲稿(发言稿)的写作方法,考生应该把这篇英语作文写得朴实、真切,有感染力。按照命题的要求,这篇英语作文应该包含两个主要部分:第一部分是自我介绍,尤其是对自己在英语和活动组织方面的特长要加以详细说明,第二部分说明自己的设想,包括校内和校际间的活动设想和预期目标。文章的要点有:(1)“我”的姓名、性格及愿望;(2)特长(尤其是英语方面的的特长);(3)参与组织过的活动;(4)“我”的设想一(校内活动设想);(5)“我”的设想二(校际间活动介绍)。
该书面表达的主体主体时态应该是一般现在时;主体人称应为第一人称单数。可能使用的书面语言素材包括:have independent thought(有独立思想);have a good command of sth.(擅长某事);have great social skills (有很强的社交能力);gain experience from(从...中获取经验);spare no effort to do(不遗余力去做);run for(竞选);be popular(受欢迎)等等。

[2013年高考英语天津卷书面表达满分作文展示]
Good afternoon, my dear friends.
I am Li Jin, a student from English Department. I'm friendly with (动词短语使用合理) all my classmates and teachers. I have a good command of English, having independent thought and great social skills, and I have organized some English activities in our class and our department, from wich I have gained a lot of experience. So now, I'd like to run for (高级短语) the vice president of the English club in our university. Now, let me show you my plans (承上启下,行文连贯):
I'll spare no effort to get (使役动词使用恰当) more and more students involved in the activities organized by the club. I plan to make the work of our club more popular to encourage all the students to improve their English (复杂句式使用得当). So English lectures, English parties and English contests are frequently held in our university, and if possible, we’ll make close cooperation on them with some other universities (长难句使用恰当).
I wish all of you would vote for me! (高级句式,主从复合句)
Thank you!

[2013年高考英语天津卷书面表达失分作文分析]
Good afternoon, my dear friends.
My name is Li Jin. I'm outgoing and get on well with my classmates and teachers. I am skillful in (词义使用错误,应该用skilled) organizing all kinds of activities. I'd like to run for the vice president of the English club in our school (词汇前后不一致,用university更好), I know as the vice president, I must do the following things for the club: I will try to make it known to every student and more students involved in the activities organized by the club. Also, to improve our English and get more students interested in English. I intend to hold (动词有误,应用organize,意为“组织”) some activities at university, like lectures and English parties and inter-university activities (与前文重复,应改为代词ones) such as English debate competitions and speech contests. I hope all of you vote me (句式错误,hope后的宾语从句表示将来的动作,应用一般将来时态;表示“选举”时应用动词短语vote for).
Thank you!
重点单词   查看全部解释    
social ['səuʃəl]

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adj. 社会的,社交的
n. 社交聚会

 
encourage [in'kʌridʒ]

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vt. 鼓励,促进,支持

联想记忆
popular ['pɔpjulə]

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adj. 流行的,大众的,通俗的,受欢迎的

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independent [indi'pendənt]

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adj. 独立的,自主的,有主见的
n. 独立

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outgoing ['aut.gəuiŋ]

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adj. 喜欢外出的,离开的,外向的 n. 外出,开支,

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debate [di'beit]

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n. 辩论,讨论
vt. 争论,思考

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intend [in'tend]

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vt. 想要,计划,打算,意指

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cooperation [kəu.ɔpə'reiʃən]

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n. 合作,协作

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organize ['ɔ:gənaiz]

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v. 组织

 
command [kə'mɑ:nd]

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n. 命令,指挥,控制
v. 命令,指挥,支配

联想记忆

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