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听笑话学英语:10 Husbands, Still a Virgin(10个丈夫)

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[00:21.69]10 Husbands, Still a Virgin 10个丈夫,仍是一个处女
[00:29.79]词汇扫描
[00:33.54]virgin 处女
[00:36.43]field services 维修服务
[00:40.01]get screwed 被骗
[00:43.30]英文原文
[00:45.68]A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands.
[00:51.03]On their wedding night, she told her new husband,
[00:54.17]"Please be gentle, I'm still a virgin."
[00:57.96]"What?" said the puzzled groom.
[01:00.74]"How can that be if you've been married ten times?"
[01:05.24]"Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative:
[01:10.82]he kept telling me how great it was going to be.
[01:14.26]Husband #2 was in software services:
[01:17.75]he was never really sure how it was supposed to function,
[01:21.75]but he said he'd look into it and get back to me.
[01:25.49]Husband #3 was from field services:
[01:28.93]he said everything checked out diagnostically
[01:31.26]but he just couldn't get the system up.
[01:34.69]Husband #4 was in telemarketing:
[01:37.67]even though he knew he had the order,
[01:40.25]he didn't know when he would be able to deliver.
[01:43.44]Husband #5 was an engineer:
[01:45.77]he understood the basic process
[01:47.93]but he wanted three years to research, implement,
[01:51.27]and design a new state-of-the-art method.
[01:54.66]Husband #6 was from finance and administration:
[01:58.61]he thought he knew how,
[01:59.97]but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.
[02:03.16]Husband #7 was in marketing: although he had a nice product,
[02:07.45]he was never sure how to position it.
[02:10.69]Husband #8 was a psychologist: all he ever did was talk about it.
[02:17.07]Husband #9 was a gynecologist: all he did was look at it.
[02:22.46]Husband #10 was a stamp collector: all he ever did was...
[02:27.11]God! I miss him! But now that I've married you, I'm really excited!"
[02:33.74]"Good," said the new husband, "but, why?"
[02:37.58]"You're a lawyer. This time I know I'm gonna get screwed!"
[02:44.76]中文大意
[02:45.77]一个律师与一个之前离了十次婚的女人结了婚。
[02:50.72]新婚之夜,新娘对她的新任丈夫说:
[02:54.17]"请温柔一点,我还是个处女。"
[02:56.94]"什么?"新郎是大惑不解。
[02:59.78]"怎么可能呢?如果你已经结了十次婚的话。"
[03:03.06]"嗯,我的第一任丈夫是一个销售代表:
[03:07.54]他只是不停的告诉我这会是非常非常棒的事情,(但什么也没做)。
[03:13.91]第二任丈夫从事软件服务工作:
[03:17.46]他从来没有真正的确定应该如何使用这个功能,
[03:20.75]不过,他说,他会去深入研究一下,然后再回头告诉我。
[03:26.05]第三任丈夫是维修人员:
[03:28.53]他说一切都非常仔细地检查过了,但是,系统就是起不来。
[03:33.84]第四任丈夫是电话推销员:
[03:36.12]尽管他知道订单已经到手,但他就是不知道什么时候可以发货。
[03:41.93]第五任丈夫是一个工程师:他懂得基本的流程,
[03:46.13]但是他想再花三年去研究、实施并设计一个全新的顶级方案。
[03:51.79]第六任丈夫从事金融管理工作:
[03:55.42]他认为他知道怎么做,但他不确定那到底是不是该他做的事。
[04:00.38]第七任丈夫是市场营销工作的人:
[04:05.02]虽然他有一个非常不错的产品,但他却不知道怎样去部署这个东西。
[04:11.20]第八任丈夫是一个心理学家:他整天只会耍嘴皮子,什么也做不出来。
[04:16.35]第九任丈夫是一个妇科医生:(他也好不到那去),
[04:20.59]他成天就只会眼睛看,什么行动都没有。
[04:24.97]第十任丈夫喜欢集邮:他以往所做的就是…
[04:29.12]天啊!我真怪想他的!不过现在,我已经嫁给了你,我真的好兴奋!"
[04:35.83]"不错,"新任律师丈夫说道,"但是,这是为什么呢?"
[04:42.03]"因为你是一个律师啊,我知道这一次一定会被折腾坏了"。
[04:55.70]逐句对照
[05:00.15]A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands.
[05:11.01]On their wedding night, she told her new husband,
[05:14.10]"Please be gentle, I'm still a virgin."
[05:23.65]"What?" said the puzzled groom.
[05:26.88]"How can that be if you've been married ten times?"
[05:38.31]"Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative:
[05:43.31]he kept telling me how great it was going to be.
[05:57.42]Husband #2 was in software services:
[06:00.55]he was never really sure how it was supposed to function,
[06:04.90]but he said he'd look into it and get back to me.
[06:20.60]Husband #3 was from field services:
[06:24.03]he said everything checked out diagnostically
[06:26.16]but he just couldn't get the system up.
[06:37.25]Husband #4 was in telemarketing:
[06:40.84]even though he knew he had the order,
[06:43.67]he didn't know when he would be able to deliver.
[06:54.66]Husband #5 was an engineer:
[06:56.63]he understood the basic process
[06:58.65]but he wanted three years to research, implement,
[07:02.07]and design a new state-of-the-art method.
[07:15.62]Husband #6 was from finance and administration:
[07:19.56]he thought he knew how,
[07:20.78]but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.
[07:32.93]Husband #7 was in marketing: although he had a nice product,
[07:37.13]he was never sure how to position it.
[07:51.21]Husband #8 was a psychologist: all he ever did was talk about it.
[08:03.49]Husband #9 was a gynecologist: all he did was look at it.
[08:16.74]Husband #10 was a stamp collector: all he ever did was...
[08:21.42]God! I miss him! But now that I've married you, I'm really excited!"
[08:39.15]"Good," said the new husband, "but, why?"
[08:49.17]"You're a lawyer. This time I know I'm gonna get screwed!"
[09:03.29]多学一点
[09:08.25]virgin 处女
[09:10.18]好奇的朋友可能会问,那"处男"是什么?
[09:14.69]那还是 virgin,
[09:17.32]So, are you still a virgin? It's nothing to be ashamed of.
[09:25.60]电影《毕业生》中的对白
[09:33.94]how can that be,表达的是一种"惊讶",意思是"那怎么可能呢",
[09:39.75]通常是碰到的让人感觉匪夷所思的事情,
[09:53.33]Come on, how could that be??"这可能吗?"
[09:57.46]field services 维修服务
[10:01.91]field service division 维修部
[10:06.06]field 田野,庄稼地
[10:15.67]field service
[10:18.95]get screwed 被骗
[10:25.12]I got screwed at that gift shop.
[10:35.13]I got screwed …
[10:39.43]get screwed 用的却是screw最原始的意义
[10:49.73]Fuck you
[10:52.87]screw you
[10:54.40]相信聪明的你已经明白为什么一个结了10次婚还是virgin的女人
[10:59.69]为什么对get screwed 这么excited
[11:06.72]重新听一次故事原文
[11:10.05]A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands.
[11:14.91]On their wedding night, she told her new husband,
[11:18.45]"Please be gentle, I'm still a virgin."
[11:22.19]"What?" said the puzzled groom.
[11:24.77]"How can that be if you've been married ten times?"
[11:29.56]"Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative:
[11:34.97]he kept telling me how great it was going to be.
[11:38.25]Husband #2 was in software services:
[11:41.70]he was never really sure how it was supposed to function,
[11:46.00]but he said he'd look into it and get back to me.
[11:49.24]Husband #3 was from field services:
[11:52.78]he said everything checked out diagnostically
[11:55.35]but he just couldn't get the system up.
[11:58.43]Husband #4 was in telemarketing:
[12:01.62]even though he knew he had the order,
[12:04.19]he didn't know when he would be able to deliver.
[12:07.13]Husband #5 was an engineer:
[12:09.60]he understood the basic process
[12:11.73]but he wanted three years to research, implement,
[12:15.41]and design a new state-of-the-art method.
[12:18.39]Husband #6 was from finance and administration:
[12:22.74]he thought he knew how,
[12:24.00]but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.
[12:26.93]Husband #7 was in marketing: although he had a nice product,
[12:31.53]he was never sure how to position it.
[12:34.82]Husband #8 was a psychologist: all he ever did was talk about it.
[12:41.69]Husband #9 was a gynecologist: all he did was look at it.
[12:46.65]Husband #10 was a stamp collector: all he ever did was...
[12:51.19]God! I miss him! But now that I've married you, I'm really excited!"
[12:57.97]"Good," said the new husband, "but, why?"
[13:01.82]"You're a lawyer. This time I know I'm gonna get screwed!"

重点单词   查看全部解释    
puzzled

想一想再看

adj. 困惑的;搞糊涂的;茫然的

 
implement ['implimənt,'impliment]

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n. 工具,器具; 当工具的物品
vt. 实施

联想记忆
stamp [stæmp]

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n. 邮票,图章,印,跺脚
v. 跺脚,盖章

 
administration [əd.mini'streiʃən]

想一想再看

n. 行政,管理,行政部门

联想记忆
collector [kə'lektə]

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n. 收集家,收税员

 
previously ['pri:vju:sli]

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adv. 先前,在此之前

 
groom [gru:m]

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n. 马夫,新郎,男仆
vt. 刷洗,照看马,

联想记忆
psychologist [sai'kɔlədʒist]

想一想再看

n. 心理学家

联想记忆
gentle ['dʒentl]

想一想再看

adj. 温和的,轻柔的,文雅的,温顺的,出身名门的

 
screw [skru:]

想一想再看

n. 螺钉,螺丝,螺旋,螺旋桨,螺状物
v.

 

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