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Rachel: Ok, fine. Gunther, you know what, I am a terrible waitress, do you know why I'm a terrible waitress?
好了，甘瑟，你知道吗？我是个很差劲的服务生。
Because, I don't care. I don't care. I don't care which pot is regular and which pot is decaf, I don't care where the tray spot is, I just don't care, this is not what I wanna do.
你知道这是为什么吗？因为我不在乎。我不在乎哪壶是普通咖啡，哪壶是低咖啡因。我不在乎盘子区在哪里。我就是不在乎。这不是我想做的工作。
So I don't think I should do it anymore. I'm gonna give you my weeks notice. What? !
所以我想我不该再做下去了。我要提出我的星期通告。 什么？
Rachel: Gunther, I quit.
甘瑟，我辞职。
Chandler: Does this mean we're gonna have to start paying for coffee?
这表示以后喝咖啡要付钱了吗？
Ross:...and 12,22,18, four...What?
12，22，18 干嘛？
Chandler: I spelled out boobies.
我拼出了"乳房"。
Monica: Ross, put me down for another box of the mint treasures, ok? Where, where are the mint treasures?
再给我一盒薄荷口味的，好吗？薄荷饼干在哪里？
Ross: Ah, we're out. I sold them all.
没有了，都卖光了。
Monica: What?
什么？
Ross: Monica, I'm cutting you off.
莫妮卡，我不能再让你吃下去了。
Monica: No. No, just just a couple more boxes. It it it's no big deal, all right, I'm I'm cool. You gotta help me out with a couple more boxes!
别，再两盒就好。这也没什么，我很好。你得帮我再弄两盒！
Ross: Mon, look at yourself. You have cookie on your neck.
看看你自己。你脖子上还有饼干。
Monica: Oh God!
老天！
Chandler: So, how many you've sold so far? Uh, check this out. Five hundred and seventeen boxes!
你卖了几盒？ 你看。417盒！
Chandler: Oh my God, how did you do that?
老天，你怎么办到的？
Ross: Okay, the other night I was leaving the museum just as 'Laser Floyd' was letting out of the planetarium, without even trying I sold 50 boxes!
前两天晚上我离开博物馆的时候 天文馆正在放激光佛洛依德。我随随便便，就卖了五十盒！
That's when it occurred to me, the key to my success, 'the munchies.' So I ah, started hitting the NYU dorms around midnight. I am selling cookies by the case. They call me: 'Cookie Dude!'
这时我想到成功的关键就是 "饥饿感"。所以我开始在午夜时分到纽约大学的宿舍去。我把饼干论箱卖。他们叫我"饼干佬"！
Chandler: Okay, but l'm not going to call you that Okay.
很好，但是我不会那么叫你的。 好的。
Rachel: Okay, stop what you're doing, I need envelope stuffers, I need stamp lickers...
放下手边的事。我需要人，帮我塞信封、舔邮票
Ross: Oh hey, who did these resumes for ya? Me! On my computer.
谁帮你写履历表的？ 我！用我的电脑写的。
Ross: Well you sure used a large font.
你还真用了够大号的黑体字。
Chandler: Eh, yeah, well ah, waitress at a coffee house and cheer squad co captain only took up so much room.
对，"咖啡厅的服务生"和啦啦队队长，占不了多少空间。
Rachel: Hey hey hey that's funny! You're funny Chandler! You're a funny guy! You know what else is really funny? !
真有趣！你好有趣，钱德！你有趣极了知道还有哪件事也很有趣吗？！
Chandler: Something else I might've said?
我说错了什么吗？
Rachel: I don't know, I don't know, weren't you the guy that told me to quit my job when I had absolutely nothing else to do? Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! !
我不知道，不是你在我毫无后路的时候叫我辞职的吗？哈！哈！哈！哈！哈！！
Ross: Sweetie, calm down, it's gonna be ok.
别激动，事情会顺利的。
Rachel: No, it's not gonna be ok Ross, tomorrow is my last day, and I don't have a lead.
不，不会的。明天是我最后一天上班，而我到现在还毫无进展。
Ok, you know what, I'm just gonna, I'm just gonna call Gunther and I'm gonna tell him, I'm not quitting.
你知道吗？我要打电话给甘瑟，说我不辞职了。
Chandler: You you you don't wanna give in to the fear.
你不能向恐惧投降。
Rachel: You and your stupid fear. I hate your fear. I would like to take you and your fear...
你和你愚蠢的恐惧！我痛恨你的恐惧。我要把你和你的恐惧
Joey: Hey! I got great news!
嘿，我有好消息！
Chandler: Run, Joey! Run for your life!
快跑，乔伊，逃命去吧！
Joey: What? Rach, hey listen, have you ever heard of Fortunata Fashions? No.
干嘛？瑞秋，听好了。你听过福图那塔时装没有？ 没。
Joey: Well my old man is doing a plumbing job down there and he heard they have an opening. So, you want me to see if I can get you an interview?
我老爸在那里做水电工，听说那里要找人。要他帮你安排面试吗？
Rachel: Oh my God! Yes, I would love that, oh, that is soo sweet, Joey.
天哪，我要，太好了！你好可爱，乔伊。
Joey: Not a problem. And now for the great news.
小事一桩。现在告诉你们好消息。
Ross: What, that wasn't the great news?
刚才那个不是好消息？
Joey: Only if you think it's better than this snow in a can! ! I got it at work. Mon, you want me to decorate the window, give it a kind of Christmas lookie?
除非你们觉得比这个消息更好。喷雪！要我装饰窗户吗？看起来有圣诞的感觉？
Monica: Christmas cookie?
圣诞饼干？
Joey: Ok, and ah, this one here is a Douglas fir, now it's a little more money, but you get a nicer smell.
好，这是一棵道格拉斯枞树。这个比较贵一点，但也比较香。
Guy: Looks good. I'll take it.
看起来不错，我买了。
Phoebe: Wait, wait, wait, wait! No, no, you don't want that one. No, you can have this cool brown one.
等等，不要 不要买那棵。不，你可以买这棵棕色的树。
Guy: It it it's almost dead!
这树都快死了。
Phoebe: Ok but that's why you have to buy it, so it can fulfill it's Christmas destiny, otherwise they're gonna throw it into the chipper. Tell him, Joey.
所以非买不可，让它完成它的圣诞宿命。不然，他们就会把它拿去切碎。告诉他。
Joey: All right. Yeah, the ah, trees that don't fulfill their Christmas destiny are thrown in the chipper.
对，无法完成圣诞宿命的树。就要拿去切碎。
Guy: I I think I'm gonna look around a little bit more.
我还是再看看吧。
Joey: Pheebs, you gotta stop doing this, I working on commission here.
你不能再这样搞下去了。我是赚佣金的！
Monica: Hey, guys. I'm here to pick out my Christmas tree.
我来挑一棵圣诞树。
Phoebe: Well look no further, this one's yours! Ahhh.
别看了，就买这棵！
Monica: Is this the one that I threw out last year?
这是我去年丢掉的树吗？
Phoebe: All right you know what, never mind! Everybody wants to have a green one!
算了，大家都想买绿树！
God. Sorry, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to get so emotional, I guess it's just, The holidays are just hard.
对不起，我也不想这么情绪化。过节就是让人很难受。
Monica: Oh honey, is that 'cause your mom died around Christmas?
亲爱的，这是因为你母亲在圣诞节前后过世吗？
Phoebe: Oh, I wasn't even thinking about that.
我还没想到那件事呢。
Monica: Oh.
哦。
Ross: Hi there. How many ah, how many did you sell?
嗨，你卖了多少？
Girl: I'm not going to tell you! You're the bad man who broke Sarah's leg.
我不告诉你。你是害莎拉断腿的坏人。
Ross: Hey now! That was an accident, ok?
嘿，那是意外，好吗？
Girl: You're a big scrud.
你是个大斗蛋。
Ross: What's a scrud?
什么叫斗蛋？
Girl: Why don't you look in the mirror, scrud.
照镜子就看到了，斗蛋？
Ross: I don't have too. I can just look at you.
我不用照镜子。我看你就行了。
Leader: All right girls, and man. Let's see your final tallies. Ohhhh, Debbie, 321 boxes of cookies, Very nice.
好，各位小女孩和大男人。我们看看大家的总成绩。黛比，321盒饼干，很好。
Ross: Not nice enough.
还不够好。
Leader: Charla, 278. Sorry, dear, but still good.
夏拉。278盒。对不起，亲爱的，但还是不错。
Ross: Good for a scrud.
对斗蛋来说是不错。
Leader: Oh, yes Elizabeth. Ah, 871.
你呢，伊莉莎白？871盒。
Ross: That's crap! Sister Brown Bird. Good going.
胡扯。棕鸟修女。做得好。
Leader: Who's next?
下一个是谁？
Ross: Hi there!
嗨。
Leader: Hi. And batting for Sarah, Ross Geller, 872. Although, it looks like you bought an awful lot of cookies yourself.
嗨。替代莎拉的罗斯盖勒。872盒。不过看样子，你自己买了一大堆饼干。
Ross: Um, that is because my doctor says that I have a very serious...nougat...deficiency.
那是因为我的医生说我有很严重的 果仁糖 不足。
Chandler: Tell us what happened, Brown Bird Ross.
把事情的经过告诉我们，棕鸟罗斯。
Ross: Well, I lost. Some little girl loaned her uniform to her nineteen year old sister, who went down to the U.S.S.Nimitz, and sold over 2,000 boxes.
我输了，有个小女孩把制服借给19岁的姐姐。她到美国轮船尼米兹号卖掉了两千多盒。
Chandler: Hey! How'd the interview go?
面试怎么样？我搞砸了。
Rachel: Oh, I blew it. I wouldn't've even hired me.
连我自己都不会请我。
Ross: Oh, come here. Come here sweetie, listen, you're gonna go on like a thousand interviews before you get a job. That's not how that was supposed to come out.
过来，甜心。听我说 找到工作之前，要应征一千次 这种情形应该不会发生。
Phoebe: This just is the worst Christmas ever.
这是最糟糕的圣诞节。
Chandler: You know what, Rach, maybe you should just, you know stay here at the coffee house.
也许你应该留在咖啡厅。
Rachel: I can't! It's too late! Terry already hired that girl over there. Look at her, she's even got waitress experience. Last night she was teaching everybody how to make swans.
不行了，太迟了。特瑞已经请了那个女孩。你们看看她。她还有当服务生的经验。昨天晚上，她还教大家把餐巾折成她说的是"天鹅"。
Chandler: Huh, seeing that drunk Santa wet himself, really perked up my Christmas.
看到酒醉的圣诞老人尿湿了自己我的圣诞节可真快乐。
Phoebe: Oh! Oh my God!
哦！我的天！
Joey and Merry Christmas! !
圣诞快乐！！
Phoebe: You saved them! You guys! Oh God, you're the best!
你们救了他们！老天，你们太棒了！
Chandler: It's like 'Night of the Living Dead Christmas Trees.'
好像是《活死人之夜》的圣诞树。
Rachel: Hello? Yeah, this is she. Oh! You're kidding! You're kidding! Oh thank you! I love you!
对，我就是。你开玩笑！谢谢，我爱你！
Chandler: Sure, everybody loves a kidder.
当然啦，大家都爱开玩笑的人。
Rachel: I got the job!
我找到工作了！
Oh! That's great! Hey! Nice!
太好了。
Phoebe: Oh, God bless us, everyone.
上帝保佑我们大家！
Rachel: Here we go. Serving my last cup of coffee. There you go. Enjoy.
来，这是我最后一次端咖啡。来。用心品尝吧。
Chandler: Should I tell her I ordered tea? Ross & No. No.
我该告诉她我点的是茶吗？ 不要说。
Rachel: Um, excuse me, everyone. Ah, this is my last night working here, and I ah, just wanted to say that I made some really good friends here, and ah, it's just time to move on.
对不起，各位？这是我在这里，工作的最后一夜。我只想说我在这里交了一些好朋友。现在是向前走的时候了。
Ah, and no offence to everybody who ah, still works here, but you have no idea how good it feels to say that as of this moment I will never have to make coffee again.
我无意冒犯，各位留在这里的人，但你们不知道我多庆幸。可以在这一刻说，我再也不必冲咖啡了。
Rachel's Boss: Now Mr. Kaplan Sr. likes his coffee strong, so you're gonna use two bags instead of one, see.
老卡普兰先生喜欢喝浓咖啡。所以一包不够，要用两包。
Now pay attention, 'cause this part's tricky, see some people use filters just once.
注意听好了，这里很需要技巧。有些人的滤纸只用一次。
Ross: I'm, I'm sorry you didn't get to go to space camp, and I'm hoping that maybe somehow, this may help make up for it. Ok?
我很遗憾你不能参加太空营，我希望这个或许 能帮我补偿你，好吗？
Presenting Sarah Tuttle's Private Very Special Space Camp! !
接下来是莎拉图多的私人特制太空营！！
Sarah: Really Mr. Geller, you don't have to do this.
真的，你不必这么做的。
Ross: Oh come on! Here we go! Stand by for mission countdown!
别客气，来吧！准备倒数！
Joey: Ten, ten...nine, nine, nine...eight, eight, eight...Ok, Blast off!
十，十 九，九，九 八，八，八 好，发射！
Chandler: I'm an alien. I'm an alien.
我是外星人！
Ross: Oh no! An asteroid!
不，小行星来了！
