Don't underestimate the power of words.Saying to Thordis that I raped her changed my accord with myself, as well as with her.But most importantly, the blame transferred from Thordis to me.Far too often, the responsibility is attributed to female survivors of sexual violence, and not to the males who enact it.Far too often, the denial and running leaves all parties at a great distance from the truth.There's definitely a public conversation happening now, and like a lot of people,we're heartened that there's less retreating from this difficult but important discussion.I feel a real responsibility to add our voices to it.What we did is not a formula that we're prescribing for others.Nobody has the right to tell anyone else how to handle their deepest pain or their greatest error.Breaking your silence is never easy, and depending on where you are in the world,it can even be deadly to speak out about rape.I realize that even the most traumatic event of my life is still a testament to my privilege,because I can talk about it without getting ostracized, or even killed.But with that privilege of having a voice comes the responsibility of using it.
