How's your morning?Well, better than yours, it seems.Half this frickin' town is taking pot shots at the President.Now my only job today is picking the perfect high-ranking administration official to push out there as his human shield.It's a bitch being Chief of Staff, Mike. I'm sure you'll find someone to hang out to dry before POTUS comes after you.Listen, how sure are you that this market hit wasn't an attack on our economy? Terrorism?Well, if it was terrorism, Research would've picked it up and I would've stopped it before it ever happened.Whatever the hell it was...Computer malfunction. It feels like we were attacked.We weren't.What?Nothing you need to worry about.Hey, Jeanie, I need the head of the SEC.Right away, sir.You need help, little man? Are you lost from the tour?I crashed the stock market yesterday.Good for you. Let me know if you decide to invade Baghdad.Tonight, the stock market will close at 10,233 points, after regaining 617 points.I'd like to discuss this and other more pressing matters with your immediate superior, the President.Okay, then. The party's over. Jeanie! Get a hand in here? This kid's AWOL from the tour and then some.I'm sorry you feel that way. You can expect your personal portfolio to drop another 16% today. We'll talk again soon.
