SAT经典范文赏析

工业革命 Industrial Revolution
Jessica W. For example, the innovative works of the Industrial Revolution forever changed human existence by pushing technology to the limit. In the 19th century, millions of slaves injured themselves thanks to the vigorous work of handpicking cotton. Fortunately, a famous and brilliant inventor, Eli Whitney, finally created a ground-breaking solution, known as the cotton gin. Furthermore, Eli Whitney needed to think outside of his time's orthodox mind set in order to free millions from the detrimental labor to thrive in more desirable occupations. Several years later, one of the most virtuoso and influential geniuses, Nicholas Ford, created one of society's most profitable and convenient ways of transportation, known as the automobile. Before Ford's invention, carriages and trains were the most popular forms of transportation and a four-wheel personal vehicle was unimaginable. However, with I the affordable Model T vehicle, the public could easily commute to work and travel to farther destinations. Revolutionary inventors, like Eli Whitney and Nicholas Ford, have progressed society through their imaginations.

点评:欣赏一下Jessica详细描述工业革命的每个句子的过渡词和偏正短语，我把它们列出来，看看你否能跟上：For example ... In the 19th century ... Fortunately ... Furthermore… Several years later ... Before Ford's invention ... However...搐长使用过渡句和偏正短语，是个好作者。